How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
