i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
