You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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