its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
