Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
