Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
