I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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