Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
