ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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