Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Randomize
