Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize