Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
