it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
