Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
