your thong is hanging out like whoa
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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