omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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