Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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