Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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