we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
