11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
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