girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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