11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize
