He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
