why didn't you poke me back
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
