This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize