K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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