i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
