quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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