that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Its about making memories worth repressing
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Randomize
