The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
