my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
And the cops told us we were all naked.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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