At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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