North Korea, Best Korea!
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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