i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
