she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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