I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
