I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
