Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
how does that bad decision feel?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
