i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize