Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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