I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Panties = found
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
