Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
