It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Randomize
