i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
