8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
