Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
