No stitches, just platelets and will power
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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