laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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