My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
