is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
